Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?
Aristotle: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
Bill Clinton: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken?
Bill Gates: I have just released chicken ME, which will not only cross roads, but lay eggs, file your importaint documents, and balance your checkbook and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of The Chicken.
Captain James T. Kirk: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
Colonel Sanders: I missed one.
Dr. Seuss: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I've not been told.
Einstein: Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?
Ernest Hemingway: To die. In the rain.
Fox Mulder: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it.
Freud: The fact that you are all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
Grandpa: In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road and that was good enough for us.
Jerry Falwell: Because the chicken was gay. Is't it obvious? Can't you people see te plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side." That's what "they" call it, the "other side." Yes my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens untill we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like the "other side." That chicken should not be crossing that road. It is as simple as that.
Karl Marx: It was a historical inevitability.
Louis Farrakhan: The road, you see, represents the "black man". The chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.
Martin Luther King, Jr: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without their motives called into question.
Pat Buchanan: To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.
Ronald Reagan: What chicken?
Saddam Hussein: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
The Bible: And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

Back