A Rose by any other name...

STANDARD TERMS:

1 MASTURBATING
2 Onanism (A biblical term)
3 Playing with your penis
4 Playing with yourself
5 Beating your meat
6 Beating off
7 Jacking off
8 Jerking off
9 Stroking or stroking it
10 Stroking your cock
11 Stroking your meat
12 Getting a hand job
13 Whacking off
14 Shooting off
15 Wanking or Wanking off (Mainly a British term)
16 Getting your gun (Military term?)
17 Frigging
18 Friggin' your riggin'
19 Fucking your fist or fist fucking (but this last usually refers to anal or vaginal penetration by a hand)

OTHER PURE VERB FORMS

20 Pulling your pud
21 Pounding your pud
22 Pulling your putz (Yiddish term)
23 Flipping off
24 Rubbing the wad
24 Smacking off
25 Jerking rod
26 Firing your peter
27 Spike your cock
28 Pop your peter

DOING THINGS--ANIMAL METAPHORS

29 Milking the mouse
30 Sperming the worm
31 Loping your mule (A southernism)
32 Milking the bull (Another southernism)
33 Riding the bull
34 Whipping your turkey
35 Slapping the monkey
36 Stroking the muskrat
37 Chocking your chicken
38 Charming the snake
39 Making the hooded cobra spit
40 Strangling the goose
41 Making the rooster crow
42 Shaking the snake
43 Skinning the lizzard
44 Ride the dolphin

DOING THINGS--VEGETABLE METAPHORS

45 Popping your nuts
46 Pealing the banana
46 Rubbin' the nubbin
48 Juicing the plum (Very descriptive, I think)
49 Jerkin' your gerkin
50 Spiggin' the twig
51 Sap your woody
52 Juicing a woody
53 Spanking the stick
54 Shelling the bean pod
55 Skinning the onion
56 Slicking the slippery stick
57 Slicking your stick
58 Peeling the wand
59 Slicking the willow twig
60 Popping your cork

DOING THINGS--MINERAL METAPHORS

61 Pumping a gusher (Obviously from the Texas oil fields)
62 Panning for white gold (From California?)
63 Getting your rocks off

DOING THINGS--MUSICAL

64 Playing your flute
65 Tootling your flute
66 Pounding the pipes
67 Playing a tune on the pork flute
68 Ringing your dong
69 Playing the skinflute
70 Organ solo (or duet?)

MEAT AND BONE -- Beating your meat (Not counted--repeat from standard)

71 Skinning the weenie
72 Bone it off
73 Bopping the baloney
74 Bouncing your boner
75 Slapping your boner
76 Boffing your boner
77 Slapping the salami

JUICE & CREAM

78 Jazzing your juicer
79 Creaming your cock
80 Pumping up ball juice
81 Churning man cream
82 Letting loose the juice
83 Milk your dick
84 Making prick juice
85 Milking your doodle
86 Cruising for an oozing
87 Pumping the juice handle

EXERCISE & GAMES

88 Rubbin' the rigid rod
89 Playing pocket pool
90 Four fingered shuffle (as opposed to 2 fingered shuffle; female)
91 Five fingered shuffle or (There seems to be some
92 Five fingered exercise disagreement as to the number of fingers used--but everybody has his own technique)
93 Pumping the muscle
94 Stiffening your noodle
95 Hand to gland combat (I also like this new term!)
96 Blasting a pocket rocket
97 Tickle your dick

THINGS ABOUT PEOPLE

98 Irking the dude--Recently sent to me--I really like it
99 Flogging the bishop
100 Pleasing the pope
101 Spanking Elvis
102 Making out with yourself
103 Punishing your clown
104 Having a date with Rosy and her 4 sisters
105 An outing with Tom Thumb and his four brothers

WORK? (Nice Work If You Can Get It)

106 Lubing the tube
107 Sowing your seed
108 Trimming your wick
109 Polishing your knob
110 Pumping the piston
111 Pumping the magic Jerkins' lotion handle
112 Popping a wad by hand
113 Cumming by hand

OTHER

114 Jerking your joy stock
115 Jazzing your joy stick
116 Jacking your joy stick
117 Juicing your joy stick
118 Wet dream on demand
119 Having the urge for a surge
120 Cum in the air
121 Go to Bangkok or Come from Bangkok
122 There is also ABUSING YOURSELF--I've never understood why it's called that, since everybody does it and enjoys it so much.